Parent Resources
Do You Know Your Daughter's Name?
By Brad Peppard
Do you know your daughter’s name?
Do you know how old she is?
Of course you do. But on the Internet, things are not always as obvious as they might seem. Identities become “mutable,” and reality can be distorted – sometimes for fun, sometimes for more sinister reasons.
As the father of three teenage daughters, I certainly thought I knew my daughter’s names and ages. So you can imagine my surprise when I discovered that my youngest daughter was actually named “sexyblonde18” -- as in sexyblonde18@xyz.com. (And no, she won’t be eighteen for a while.)
The Internet has opened up an exciting new world of information and resources that were unknown when many parents were growing up. There are countless web sites that can enhance your children’s education, providing them with access to resources that can both expand their minds and pique their natural curiosity.
But the Internet is a reflection of our world, both the good and the bad. Turning your son or daughter loose on the Internet can be a very enriching experience, like a visit to the Smithsonian Museum. It can also be like turning them loose in the world’s largest porno shop and as dangerous as letting them wander alone in an environment like New York’s Times Square during the 1960s.
How can you help your children take advantage of the Internet’s riches and still protect them from undesirable content and the dangers that lurk there? You can’t possibly supervise every click of the mouse —in fact, with all of life’s demands on your time, you can’t always be home to watch them! While there are no foolproof solutions, there are some simple steps you can take to give yourself peace of mind and minimize the risks.
- Get a list of recommended web sites from your child’s school.
- Do a little surfing yourself, both on your own and with your child.
- Talk to them about what they’ve seen and where they’ve gone. (Be alert for evasiveness.)
- Ask to see their MySpace.com page and other personal web sites. (Insist.)
- Discuss openly with your children the potential dangers, especially the danger of meeting unknown Internet “friends” in the real world.
- Insist that first meetings, if any, either take place at your home or are supervised.
Remember that there are two types of risk: exposure to offensive material and the physical threat posed when your child is lured into the real world by a predator. While online threats like exposure to pornography or emotional bullying by peers need to be addressed, it is the real world dangers that are the most serious.
The best method to protect your children is to follow the basic rules of good parenting: talk to your children regularly (especially your teens), meet their friends, and know where they’re going and what they’re doing (including where they’re going and what they’re doing on the Internet). The Internet is a cornucopia of wonders and delights that every child should explore. A few precautionary steps will help you protect you children and let you get a good night’s sleep.